Lesson #19 - Affair-Proofing Your Marriage

Terry Siverd
12/02/18 - Sun AM

LESSON #19 – AFFAIR-PROOFING YOUR MARRIAGE

INTRODUCTION

“There is no better safeguard against infidelity than a vital, interesting marriage.” / Dr. Norman M. Lobenz

With so many marriages disintegrating so rapidly, how can we swim against the tide by keeping a good thing growing?

How can we help invigorate our marriage so as to find strength and sustenance for the long haul?

How can we protect our marriage against being short-lived?  How can we help create a marriage that will last a lifetime?

KEEPING FAITH

Heb.13:4 / Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled;

for fornicators and adulterers God will judge.

~ How does a marriage that begins with mutual pledges of FIDELITY end up with PERFIDY (a breach of faith)?

LITTLE FOXES THAT SPOIL THE VINE

Seldom do marriages fall apart overnight.  The disintegration usually comes from a piecemeal erosion over time.

Song of Songs 2:15 / Catch the foxes for us, the little foxes that are ruining the vineyards, while our vineyards are in blossom.

The little foxes represent little, seemingly insignificant things than can cause grossly disproportionate damage.

PLAYING WITH FIRE

Prov.6:27 / Can a man take fire in his bosom, and his clothes not be burned?

~ What are some areas that might equate with “playing with fire”?

~ When a married person engages in “flirting”, is he or she flirting with danger?

~ In the interest of preserving marital fidelity, have you (as a couple) deemed some practices as off limits? 

WARNING SIGNS

In his book, The Myth Of The Greener Grass, J. Allan Petersen offers some proactive steps to affair-proof your marriage.

1) Don't Compare The Incomparable

2) Don't Set Your Own Traps

3) Refuse To Saw The Sawdust

4) Look Through Your Partner's Glasses

5) Keep Your Hands Empty, But The Box Full

6) Become The Host, Not The Guest

7) Activate Love By Your Actions

8) Start Your Own Affair At Home

QUESTIONS FOR DISCUSSION

1. What can you do as a husband or wife to promote the health and vitality of your marriage?

2. Discuss some preventative measures that might be taken to protect a marriage from things that might harm it.

3. In observing other marriages, what have you seen in some that you don't want to see in your own marriage?

What have you seen in other marriages that you'd like to replicate in your own marriage? 

4. What gives a marriage staying power, nurturing longevity?